2-14-2010 DAY 1

Jeff left today. It was the most terrible feeling ever. He and I and Jei were crying. I feel like my heart is so broken. Im afraid of doing this alone. I know I have to carry on though. I have to be strong for him and for my boys. There are no second chances. I have to do this right. I have to prove to myself and my family how strong I am. I have to make the right choices and do the right things. I have to be the protector now as well. It’s a lot to take on, but I know in my heart that I made this choice. I chose this life for a reason. There are a lot of lessons to be learned here. Im going to try my best to stay positive and get the most out of this lesson. We will be strong, we will carry on. I miss him so much already.